Noobenheim News for Nerds 
Like many Millennials, I am a collector by nature. As a kid, I collected Pokémon cards, LEGOs, and weird pictures of dead birds. In college it was silly headbands and nerdy T-Shirts. As an adult, my tastes have grown more expensive: fancy hats, collector’s-edition fantasy books, and more makeup than a Sephora booth.
But none of these has been more time consuming or more expensive than my one true love: adorable portable collector games. It started with Neko Atsume, but quickly moved on to Boku to Wanko, and now Notice Me Senpai.
My husband thought it was cute at first. I’d cuddle up to him on the couch, phone in hand. He’d pat my head and tell me how silly it is that I need attention from little cartoon boys when he’s right there. I laughed it off, saying “Oh, don’t be silly. It’s just like that cat game. You leave stuff out and they give you money and stuff. There’s no real interaction.” And… that’s how they get you.
The new update boasts loads of new content, ranging from bonus CGs to a new shop layout. It also boasts a new interaction type. Once a senpai likes you enough, you can click on him to get some alone time, which seems to be in a dark room. They’ll stand happily as you vigorously rub and rub their little hearts, pumping their meter and watching it grow. When it reaches a certain point, your senpai will blush and say something cute like “Woah, where are you touching me?” Your senpai will have to take a break at this point, but you can pull him aside for some rubbing action up to three times a day. After you’ve really built him up and taken him to the max, the game then lets you rub his body directly. He’ll close his eyes as you rub him, this time watching as his meter grows even longer. When it reaches the max, he’ll open his eyes, blush, and say something like “Whoa. Slow down there. I’m trying to exercise some self-control here.” (I’m looking at you, Wakatoshi!)
My adorable collector game has turned into a full-blown dating simulator, and I. Can’t. Stop.
Super Love Mode only lasts 12 hours, and since you never know how soon a senpai will show up, this means you need to log in many times throughout the day to keep everyone pleased (because apparently I’m running some sort of brothel). Every night before sleep, and every morning just as I awake, I lay next to my husband in bed and fill up my senpai’s love meters. And I pay money, REAL MONEY, to do this. My husband just sighs and rolls over, for now. Perhaps one day he’ll snap. But I can’t stop yet. I won’t stop until I’ve finished the game.
Because I’m a collector. I’ve gotta catch ‘em all.
